Leaving

It feels like fall just arrived. The first pops of color on the sugar maples, the first crunch under my foot. All the vibrant colors, the crisp bite in the air, the fleece jackets, the hooded sweatshirts.

There is something special about a fall sky. Such beautiful, majestic skies.

Either from land or from air. The blue is something only seen during the fall. The shape of the clouds and the way they form.

Fall is all around me. I can feel it fading fast.
It's like it's all passing before my eyes. Before you know it winter will be here. Scarves, mittens, hot drinks, bare trees and snowflakes will abound.
Before we get there, I'm going to stop for just a moment and enjoy what remains of this glorious season.

Because before you know it the smell of burning leaves and pumpkin pies will be gone, just like this glorious barn.

We were just there a few weeks ago. Exploring, examining and enjoying. And now it's gone. Things are taken long before we want them to be. In some cases, like with this barn, things are taken when you've only just found them.
Cherish every moment, there is no telling when it will be gone.

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Weekend Recap

Boy, what a weekend. We spent lots of time away from the house. And judging from how tired Scott was today, it was probably too much. What's a family to do? There are only so many beautiful fall days to enjoy. Only so many Bears games to cringe through and only so many moments left to be made.

We try really hard to make the most of every moment given to us. There is no crystal ball that tells us if we'll have another fall to spend together as a family. God willing if we have another fall together, we have no idea how things will look.

So this weekend we did our best.

We should have know that when Kate started her day like this, we were in trouble.

I love how tiny she looks with her Uncle. It's the only time I don't look at my kid and see her as an amazon.

The farm we went to was incredibly busy. Quickly we decided to boycott the petting zoo, camel rides, and giraffe feedings. Fighting through throngs of people with a wheelchair and a cranky toddler just didn't sound like fun to me. Call me crazy.
Pumpkin' hunting better suited us.



Kate spent much time thinking. It's still unclear if she was picking out the perfect pumpkin or if she was plotting her revenge.

"Hmmm, I think I'll refuse to pose for pictures next."

Uncle Justin and Auntie Blue got off their high chair

and got a decent family picture for us.

After that I had to put her in jail.

She turned herself into a bat and broke free.


We cut the day short in favor of lunch, a good nap and some dinner at Grandma and Grandpa's.


It may not have gone as planned. We may have had a few tantrums and melt downs but we were together.

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Oh the places we go

We went here today (we never did learn what the came was)
Kate looked cute, even if she was a tired, hungry, grumpy, fussy pants.


Lots more photos to post... right after I get rid of this awful headache.

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A perfect fall day at...

the beach?

What kind of wacky nut job takes her kid to the beach on a cloudy fall day?
That's me... well and Nicole who braved the cool temps to bring Brandon out so we could all play.


There's an old quarry not far from us that was used from the 1950's until early 1990's. Excavating all the sand left a beautiful lake behind. For the last 20 years this gorgeous lake went untouched. With no trespassing signs posted and no easy access the lake just sat and sat.

While Scott served as Vice President for the Crystal Lake Anglers club (yep, my husband is super cool) they raised money and started to stock the lake, preparing for the future fishing and the lake continued to sit. Until just recently.

We saw this beauty pulled from the water from some shore side fishermen.

This untapped lake has been transformed into a beautiful rec center. Gorgeous paths, beautiful beaches, small islands, boat rental (to tap into those unsuspecting fish), and even a Culvers.


This kids laughed, played and wrestled until it was time to come home.


Many laughs, some good fellow mom time, a few photos and a happier, calmer, slightly frozen Brandi has emerged.

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The Momma

Momz, Mom-alla, Mother, Sherri, Mother Dear.... these are all things that my brothers and I call our mom. She has more nicknames that any other family member, hands down. This is done out of love.
Today we celebrated Sherri's birthday. Lucky for her she's a young 29...again.

A wonderful day, a great evening with the entire family plus Bonnie (Mom's oldest Illinois friend). Good food, great family and delicious dessert.

For The Momma that is so loved by her boys

her only grandchild

and her only daughter,

Thank you for being a great mom. We can't always see eye to eye but that never changes how much we love each other.

Happy Birthday Mom.

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News Flash

Scott has hearing loss.
Break out the band, call the press and sing it from the rooftops.
The hearing loss, apparently, is just some random fluke. There is seemingly no rhyme or reason for Scott's loss but after an extensive hearing test, it's been confirmed that there is a definite loss.
The only potential treatment would be a steroid injection directly into the inner ear through the ear canal. Sounds lovely doesn't it?
For right now were holding off on doing the injection. We'll give it a little bit of time to stabilize on it's own before shoving needles into Scott's ear drum.

S12 and his family came over for dinner and some much needed catching up. Kristin and I actually got to sit down and enjoy a meal together. Usually it's so chaotic with all the kids running that we don't get a chance to talk, this was such a welcomed departure.
I've spent more hours than I can count recently bogged down with the insurance drama from the accident. I'm hoping that today was the worst of it and now I can get back to some level of normal.
Much more to accomplish before my head hits my pillow....

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Hiding

Somewhere deep inside I have this post brewing. It's coming to me in bits and pieces I've started, just to walk away. There are all these things sitting just below the surface waiting to be released. Gratitude, pain, fear, hopes.. all stirring just out of reach.
I'll wake in the middle of the night and I would swear that I had just spoken a sentence. The type of sentence that weighs on your tongue after you've said it. The first "I love you", a sad goodbye, or the first time you udder your child's name. A sentence that once it's said you know you won't be the same again.
In my conscious thoughts I can't find that sentence but I feel like my soul is searching for it.
I've blamed it on the pain, the lack of sleep, the overwhelming feelings from life. In the end though, I worry most that I'm too closed to find it. That the fortress I have built has finally reached it's ceiling and nothing, not even my feelings, can find their way in or out. I have to trust that when it's time, when I'm ready for that sentence, I'll be able to find it. For now, I must just be open enough for the words. The words will find me, they always do. I'm certainly not one to go without for very long.

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