Boobs, tatas, the twins, breasts...

Yes, kids I'm going to talk about boobs tonight.

Boys, this is your chance to duck out of this post. Just click the little red x in the corner and come back tomorrow. Trust me when I tell you this will not wow your inner 15 year old boy, it may instead scar you for life. I'll have something more.. um... boy friendly to discuss tomorrow. Go now...



Alright girls. I'm here to tell you. Check your boobies. You need to check them and your doctor needs to check them. Check them well and check them often.

Christmas eve eve (nothing says ho,ho,ho like a ob/gyn playing around) I went in to my ob/gyn for my annual exam. During the exam he found two lumps. One in each breast. The one on the right was quite large and had been causing me some pain (that I had basically been ignoring). The one on the left was smaller and felt like a pea. I hadn't noticed either lump because I wasn't really checking.

The doctor said "if I can feel it, I have to aspirate it."
And so we tried. In his office on January 4th. The large right side lump was a cyst and the doctor was able to drain it successfully. The nurse called it a "bra cup changer". I cried.

Dr. Meyer attempted to drain the smaller, left side lump. He couldn't get it drain and declared it a mass instead of a cyst. Well, shit.

He sent me away with orders for a mammogram and an ultrasound and told me not to wait. The hospital got me in the next day.

Going in for a mammogram at age 33 is an odd experience. I was the youngest person there by 10 years (yes, I snooped at the open computer screen.. shoot me.). The breast care center couldn't have been more wonderful though. There are no men allowed in the entire area. The tv had on chick friendly shows and the waiting room was filled with snacks, treats, coffees, teas, and no outdated Sports Illustrated.

If you've heard people complain about mammograms, don't listen to them. Well, not much anyways. I was fortunate enough to get the new machine for my mammogram. While a little pinchy it wasn't bad and the entire process only lasted about 10 minutes and only 3 of those minutes were spent being squished. Certainly nothing horrible.

The ultrasound was well... an ultrasound. Totally painless. Let's keep in mind too Girls, I had just the day before had two rather large needles stuck into my boobs. So, not a big deal at all.

The radiology doctor didn't like the look of the lump either. Fuck. She wanted to perform an ultrasound guided core biopsy. Alrighty then, lets stick more needles into my boobs.

The next Tuesday (this past Tuesday the 11th) I had my core biopsy. Again, so not a big deal. Basically painless. I was restricted for lifting for 24 hours so Mom took Kate and Scott stayed in bed for the day but I really felt fine. The most uncomfortable part was the compression dressing they put on that felt like a very large, misplaced piece of underwire digging into me.

I was told I would hear test results either yesterday or today at the latest. My constant companion (the black cloud) insured that I had to wait until today to get my test results.
The words "benign fibroid adenoma" are such sweet, magical words.

There will be a 6month follow up mammogram and ultrasound and then for the rest of my life I will have mammograms every year if not every six months.

I have an extensive family history of breast cancer. I've lost family from it and I have family that have survived it. I know that should my good news ever change to bad news I will have caught it early because I will forever be obsessed with checking on my tatas.

I encourage you to do the same. The hardest part of this entire nightmare has been the waiting. None of the procedures were hard, painful or all that traumatic. The worrying, waiting and knowing that the few people that knew about this were worried too, was by far the worst part.

I feel poorly for not sharing this with you all in real time. I share so easily with Scott but I just couldn't. I couldn't handle the "pressure" of sharing. I needed to handle it on my own, in my own way, in my own time.

Take one thing from my story, go play with your boobs. Knowing that if things were bad, I caught it early was the only thing that kept me sane.

So, go forth and play. Then call your doctor and ask them to play too.


xoxox,
Brandi aka
Lumpy Boobs