"Daddy, will you miss me?"

"When you're in heaven?"

"Of course, I am Baby. I'm going to miss you all the time"


"I'm going to miss you too Daddy."


"Want to share my cookie Daddy?"

"No thanks Baby. You eat it."


Lots of visitors today. Jen and S4 came bringing cupcakes and smiles. Scott's Uncle Jim, Aunt Marlene and cousin Jason came with a toy that entertained Kate most of the evening. A long visit and manly bonding with my brother Mathew this morning and a quick drop by from Josh with every man movie in his DVD collection for Scott to borrow.

Everyone left by 4pm and Kate and I spent the night hanging out in Scott's room. We made a dinner picnic on the floor, played and watched Megamind. Scott slept almost the entire time. He would only open his eyes all the way and engage in the world around him when Kate talked to him or I got right next to him and spoke really loudly. But anytime that little girl said "Daddy" his eyes shot open and he spoke as clearly as he could. She didn't flinch. She wasn't scared, upset or seemingly bothered. She just kept right on going. Even getting him to engage in a moment of freeze dance where he hummed a tune and she danced until he stopped.
Kate and I sat on the floor and played. Laughing, goofing off dunking Kate in the pretend fruit salad soup and then sending her through the bathtub for a scrub.
I hope that the sound of her laughter will stay with him on his journey. For a brief moment we all climbed in Scott's bed, held hands and said the things that needed to be said. My heart has never hurt so much or been so full in my entire life.
I'm camped out on Scott's floor. Prepared for another long night and praying for peace.
There were moments today that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy and more moments today that I wish the whole world could feel, if only for a moment.
To everyone that is sending cards, emails, Facebook messages and posts... Thank you for all the love and support. I've been reading them to Scott. They make him peaceful. To those that are sending us their love, support and prayers that we don't even know about... we feel that love as well.

Kim  – (March 12, 2011 at 9:52 PM)  

Brandi and Scott I have no words just wanted you to know we are thinking of you

Jen and S4 –   – (March 12, 2011 at 9:57 PM)  

We had a blast with you guys today! Grandpa S4 is worn out from his adventures with S1 and Katie today!

Love you guys lots!!!

Jill –   – (March 13, 2011 at 5:22 AM)  

Thinking of you guys tonight. Enjoy all the final moments you have together. They are moments you will treasure for a lifetime.

sere –   – (March 13, 2011 at 5:50 AM)  

Love you guys.

Jodi  – (March 13, 2011 at 9:25 AM)  

Thinking of you all today, Brandi. ((hugs))

Jen  – (March 13, 2011 at 10:36 AM)  

There are just no words! Thinking of you all the time!

Up North Amherdts!  – (March 13, 2011 at 11:48 AM)  

Thank you Brandi for your wonderful Blog that allows us to be there with you at least in our hearts. Can barely read through my tears. Please give Scott a little squeeze of his hand from me, Jim, Jack and all of us.

Heather D.  – (March 13, 2011 at 4:45 PM)  

Your family is constantly in my prayers. I don't even know you guys, but you're on my mind all the time. Hugs to all of you!

Erin  – (March 13, 2011 at 7:41 PM)  

Brandi...I've been following your blog a bit-found my way here through SPN. Just wanted to tell you that I think you are a strong, amazing person, and you, Scott and little Kate are in my thoughts and prayers. You're photos are beautiful-the moments you capture are raw and real. Thinking of you...

Heidi  – (March 14, 2011 at 8:18 AM)  

Your family is beautiful and is always in my thoughts and prayers. The interactions between Scott and Kate just melt my heart. She is lucky to have a Daddy who loves her so so much, and she will always remember him.

Unplugged  – (March 14, 2011 at 8:36 AM)  

There are no words to describe how amazing you and your family are. My thoughts are with you and I send you peace, love and happiness during this very trying time. Your family is BEAUTIFUL!

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